I Love TV

Just for "Today"

2007-05-02T10:17:00.000-07:00

I'm home sick today, so I've watched more of "The Today Show" than I normally do. Usually, I like to tune in to get the news on the 8:00 hour, and then I have it on in the background for a mere half-hour or so as I bustle around getting ready. But this morning, I tuned in for the last two hours, and it turns out that the later in the show it gets, the funnier everyone starts acting.

Here are some choice quotes that I particularly enjoyed, in chronological order:

1. During a segment on "inter-facial relationships" (when one person in the couple is a lot better-looking than the other):

“What this is really about is the cruel calculus of romance. The fact is, women are better than men. They’re better dressed, they’re better read, they’re better in bed. And we get to go out with you guys, but if you want to date men, you have to go out with us, so lower your standards.”
—Dennis Kneale, managing editor of Forbes

(Btw, if you want to know more about this segment, you can read a blog post about it on the "Today Show" site: http://allday.msnbc.msn.com/archive/2007/05/02/177586.aspx)

2. Right before a commercial break:

Al Roker: We mentioned these cakes a little bit earlier. Believe it or not, these are actually cakes: this is not sushi, it’s not a box, but fondant and unbelievable cakes. We’re going to meet the artist/baker who put these together and shows us how she makes these designs.

Anne Curry: Actually, these are actually replicas of cakes. [Raps on box “cake” with her knuckles, resulting in hollow knocking sound.] These are actually what the cakes would look like—

Campbell Brown: But I think this is the icing, right?

Al: [Forcefully, perhaps even a bit defensively] This is the fondant, the fondant on the outside. There you go, breaking the illusion. Thanks a lot.

Anne: I’m about the truth, Al. Anyway, so she tells us how she really makes them, coming up.

Al: [Turns directly to Anne.] Why do you wear make-up?

3. (Technically, this wasn't part of "The Today Show," but it aired during the program's allotted time, so I'm still counting it.)
From a local news break:

Rob: Just a few moments now away from Martha Stewart’s show on NBC4, and she joins us now with a preview. Good morning, Martha.

Martha: Hey, Rob. I’m here in our greenhouse with actress Samantha Mathis. And Samantha, I understand that you have a business dealing in succulents.

Samantha: I do, I have a company called, aptly, Succulent.

Martha: Rob, do you know what succulents are?

Rob: I do not. Please tell me. [Cut back to shot of Rob, looking at the camera a bit too avidly for family television.]

Boring Public Service Announcement

2007-04-23T18:55:00.000-07:00

If there are still any devoted "American Idol" fans out there, I'm guessing they're not reading this blog — because no one reads this blog. And also because there's probably, like, only two people who still take that show seriously. And I don't think that Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest read this blog.

BUT on the offchance that there's anyone who is still a fan of that show, I want to alert you to Idol Gives Back, a worthy do-gooder event during this week's episodes.

Tomorrow and the day after (April 24 and 25), "American Idol" is aiming to raise awareness and funds for relief programs that serve children and young people in extreme poverty in the USA and Africa.

For every vote cast on April 24, "American Idol" will make a contribution to six charities serving American and African children.

On April 25, a whole bunch of celebrities will perform and viewers will be able to make their own personal donations online and by phone. That ought to be at least as much fun as a PBS pledge drive, right?

More info here: www.americanidol.com/idolgivesback/

More Wizards?!

2007-04-07T08:27:00.000-07:00

A few posts back, I wrote about what I'm sure will be a wonderful reality show capitalizing on the world's Harry Potter mania. Now for news of what may or may not be an enjoyable sitcom also capitalizing on the world's Harry Potter mania:

(Description from Cynopsis Kids)
Disney Channel has begun production on its new original series Wizards of Waverly Place. Slated to premiere on Disney Channel US in fall 2007, the live-action comedy revolves around The Russo's, a multi-cultural family with three siblings, one sister and two brothers, who engage in the regular sibling stuff. But, here's the twist, they all happen to be wizards in training and only one of them will retain their powers when they turn 19. The series is created and executive produced by Todd Greenwald (Hannah Montana).

As you folks know, I watch my share of the Disney Channel. So I'm fully aware that even the best Disney Channel shows are of questionable quality. This new show has what I consider to be a very promising premise. I hope they don't mess it up.

This Television Life

2007-04-01T16:47:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, I decided to bake cookies for a friend's birthday party. The first thing I do when I want to bake is to make sure that I have all the ingredients I need. (Seeing as I have a kitchen the size of a minivan, this takes about three seconds, give or take two seconds.) The next thing I do when I want to bake is to select an NPR program to listen to on my computer. I will not listen to anything else — not TV, not music, not live radio — nothing else will do.

When it came time to bake said cookies several weeks back, I decided to check out the "This American Life" site for my listening pleasure. Lo and behold, right there on the homepage I saw these miraculous words: "This Week: What I Learned from TV." That's right — an episode entirely devoted to my favorite pasttime!

Like lightning, I clicked on the text headline. Nothing happened. Then I clicked again and again and again, frantically moving the cursor everywhere that could possibly be a hyperlink, even only in my wildest imagination. Still nothing. Finally, it dawned on me that this was a description of the new episode coming up that week. It was not available for listening because it hadn't happened yet. I was devastated.

But those cookies wouldn't bake themselves, so I selected something from "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me" and went about melting a whole stick of butter to fatten up my friends.

Well, I finally just got around to listening to the "What I Learned from TV" episode this afternoon (just for fun this time, no desserts involved — well, except for me eating some poundcake), and I was truly delighted. In general, I enjoy "This American Life," but as an avid TV fan, my listening experience with this particular episode approached what must be my personal public radio zenith. If you are are into TV at all, then you should definitely check it out.

For me, the best part was the incredibly brief Act 4, during which Ira Glass revealed his reaction when "This American Life" was mentioned on "The OC." (Summer refers to it as "that show by those hipster know-it-alls who talk about how fascinating ordinary people are" and then snorts in derision.) I remember watching that episode and being tickled at the allusion because I am, obviously, a "This American Life" type myself. But until listening to this episode of the radio show, I had never thought about what Ira Glass' reaction might have been. I guess it's because I wasn't aware that he also loved "The OC"! That's right — Ira Glass and his wife watched the teen melodrama just as religiously as I did! In fact, they would sing along to the opening music. (If you want to skip right to this part of the episode, you can find it around the 30-minute mark.) This little bit of knowledge is like a trinket that I will treasure always, even more so because just a couple of days ago someone had the nerve to tell me that I only write about bad TV on this blog, and named "The OC" as Exhibit A.

Granted, some of the shows that I write about on this blog are far from what I would describe as high-quality, and I readily admit that. And yes, "The OC" did go through an unfortunate decline in its later years. BUT "The OC" remains one of the smarter and funnier shows of its kind in the end. And if my own opinion isn't enough, now I can say, "If it's good enough for Ira Glass, it should be good enough for you!" (That's right, Janki, I'm talking to you.)

And while we're on the subject, this blog has also covered "Friday Night Lights, old "Gilmore Girls," "Wonder Pets," and my forever love "The West Wing," all of which are critically acclaimed. So there.

But back to my original topic: As is probably patently clear, I am not ashamed of how much enjoyment I get from television. It's a big part of my life, and not only am I okay with that, I embrace it. I embrace it even though as an educated person, I should probably be apalled at how much TV I watch and how critical a role it plays in my life. I have friends who totally understand where I'm coming from, either because they feel similarly or because they are the kinds of people who can wrap their minds around that concept. But I'm sure there are many out there who would sniff haughtily at my earnest love for TV and what I believe it contributes to my peace of mind. To those people, I say, "Suck it."

Or in Ira Glass' more eloquent words, "The things I love, I love completely. And it's totally personal, my feelings about these shows; it's personal in the deepest possible way. ... And I gotta say, every single week it makes me love my wife and love TV and love everything in the world all at once." When you think about it, his response makes perfect sense. Media is a social construction, just like art. One could easily make the argument that television is a form of art, but at the very least, it's incredibly like art. If we can accept that people are moved by their experience with a sculpture or a book, then why shouldn't people be just as affected by TV? And why shouldn't they form strong attachments to their favorite shows, just like with their favorite paintings or poems? Why shouldn't we experience some bliss when we have a good experience with TV? Think about how Ira Glass describes his weekly connection with "The OC" — it awakens something in him, and it just plain makes him happy. In a sense, Ira Glass and I get high off of certain shows, and there's nothing wrong with that.

And no, there wasn't anything "special" in those cookies I was baking, so don't even go there.

(As an added bonus, in this particular episode of "This American Life" all the musical interludes are live performances by the awesome band Mates of State. After you're done with "This American Life" — and only after, if you know what's good for you — you can listen to my fave song of theirs on their MySpace page: www.myspace.com/matesofstate. Also, their fantastic cover of "Caliornia," an already fantastic song by Phantom Planet in its own right and the opening song for "The OC.")

Amen, brother!

2007-03-11T22:06:00.000-07:00

No commentary from me on this one. I think this quote stands alone.

"Deep-fried bacon. The words alone — like a song."
—Alton Brown, during Battle Breakfast on "Iron Chef America"

Will the real Mia please stand up?

2007-03-08T18:31:00.000-08:00

In this week's episode of "Gilmore Girls," the ladies traveled to North Carolina to attend a wedding. Whose wedding? Why, that of Mia, the wonderful woman who gave the Gilmore Girls a home when Lorelai was pregnant and in need of a job and shelter. As a loyal fan of the show, I recalled the appearance of Mia in an earlier episode and was excited to see her return because she had been an engaging character.

So the entire time that the Gilmores were making their way down to the wedding, I was looking forward to seeing Mia: Antics in the car — boring; where's Mia? Antics at the diner — boring; where's Mia? Antics at the motel — boring; where's Mia? Finally, there was a phone call and here was the beloved Mia! But wait, that wasn't Mia...

That's right folks, it was a completely different actress playing Mia! Previously, she had been played by Elizabeth Franz, but this time around she was being played by Kathy Baker.

Fine, I thought, maybe they couldn't get Elizabeth Franz, I can understand that. But then Kathy Baker opened her mouth and started speaking in a ceremoniously gentle manner, and I was filled with rage. The whole reason I had been intrigued by the character of Mia in the first place was because of the way Elizabeth Franz had played her: sharp and no-nonsense but also obviously warm and caring. Couldn't they have at least had Kathy Baker turn in a performance consistent with Elizabeth Franz's depiction of the character? I guess not. This new Mia One-Note was fakey and dull and I spent the rest of the episode completely distracted by the switch-up.

Oh, well, I don't know why I expected any more from "Gilmore Girls." That show sucks a big one this season anyway.

MTV for Empathy?

2007-03-01T22:22:00.000-08:00

I've recently gotten back into MTV's show "I'm From Rolling Stone," and it has really surprised me how much I'm rooting for those crazy kids. At first, almost all of them annoyed me, but now I find myself reveling in their successes.

Well, some of them still aggravate me (I'm talking to you, Miss "Jagger"), but I did manage to find a little place in my heart for Krish and Peter, both of whom struck me as pretty ridiculous figures earlier on in the series.

Maybe if I watch more reality TV I'll become a more empathetic person. On the other hand, there's "My Super Sweet Sixteen," which pretty much decimates any warm feelings I have towards the human race.

So hard to say goodbye...

2007-02-21T22:54:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to give everyone an update on my relationship with "The OC" — even though you probably don't care, but I do.

Since my last post, I watched the show's penultimate episode and once again had mixed feelings. Not that I wanted to see Ryan die, but I have to say that I was quite disappointed when the promise of someone "slowly slipping away" turned out to be nothing more than a cheap ploy to get viewers to tune in the next time around. I hate when shows' previews are so sensationalistic as to be deliberately misleading.

But despite this shameless trickery, as the most recent episode came to a close, I felt a big surge of bittersweet affection for "The OC." I am so, so sad that the series is coming to an end tomorrow. Yes, it truly went downhill for a while there, but now that it's back in full force, I'm really sorry to see it go. First "The West Wing," now "The OC" — just you wait, "Gilmore Girls" will be next.

Stop, drop, and roll — oh, wait, that's for fires...

2007-02-10T21:06:00.000-08:00

Believability has never been a calling card of "The OC," but this time the show's writers have gone too far. How is it possible that none of the characters would know what to do in the event of an earthquake? Having grown up in California myself, I am all too familiar with the regular earthquake drills that we had to do in school. Anyone who grew up in earthquake country or has kids who grew up in earthquake country would know the safety protocal if "the big one" were to strike:

Seth and Summer got it right by staying in the car until it became obvious that the telephone poll was about to fall on their vehicle, but Ryan and Taylor definitely should have run to stand in the doorjamb — after all, they apparently had enough time and energy to leap to the floor. Same goes for Julie and Caitlin — why did they go inside the ice cream shop when they should have just stopped at the doorway? I'll excuse Sandy and Kirsten for cowering on the floor of the mall as debris showered around them, though; obviously, they didn't have many choices.

But I do have to give it to "The OC" writers for their no-holds-barred attitude as the show's demise quickly approaches: The commercials hint that a character is "slowly slipping away" in the next episode, and to kill off another character so soon after Marissa's death reveals a wonderful balls-out approach to life that I like to see (not really — well, yes really in regards to TV, not really in regards to life). Good for you, "OC." You don't care what those people say.

What will those Muggles come up with next?

2007-02-08T21:52:00.000-08:00

This just in, from Publisher's Weekly:

"Hogwarts is a fictional school, right? Perhaps not everyone thinks so. Later this year the BBC in Britain is launching a reality TV series called The Sorcerer's Apprentice, set in a Hogwarts-like boarding school. The cast was chosen from an open call for 9-13-year-olds in the U.K. Children on the show will learn card tricks, Latin spells and illusions that they will perform each week for a panel of 'magic mentors,' who will decide which child is expelled (well, eliminated from competition) and must leave. Perhaps Simon Cowell has powers we don't know about?"

Can you say, AWESOME?

(Btw, I guess I should reveal that my love for Harry Potter is one of the very few things in this world that rivals my passion for TV. Basically, it's food, Harry Potter, and TV. The trifecta.)

For more HP news, here's the full PW article:
http://www.publishersweekly.com/article/CA6414520.html?nid=2788

Did you know...? Because I sure didn't!

2007-01-28T22:18:00.000-08:00

I like to think of myself as an observant person, but apparently I've been remiss on two TV-related items, which positively floored me when I finally realized the truth:

1) I've been watching "Top Chef" all season, but it wasn't until this weekend that I noticed that Cliff is only 28 years old. Did you know that? Because I sure didn't! I always thought that he was older, by about a decade. I guess he just seems like a big, solid, self-possessed guy and I couldn't imagine a dude around my age possessing those qualities. Whoops.

2) Have you seen that Olive Garden commercial where the woman enters the restaurant claiming to be meeting a date but then describes her young son? Well, I've seen that commercial about a million times* but it took maybe 999,999 viewings before I finally realized that the hostess who greets the woman is played by none other than Becki Newton, who does an awesome job playing Amanda on my beloved "Ugly Betty". Did you know that? Because I sure didn't! It must be strange for her to have a starring role on a hit show while that Olive Garden commercial is still running. Note to self: Next time I watch "Ugly Betty," I should pay attention to the commercials I zoom past on my DVR; I wonder if the Olive Garden commercial ever plays during that timeslot. It sure seems to play all the rest of the time. Enough already! We get it — soup, salad, breadsticks. We get it!

*only a slight exaggeration

And the parade continues...

2007-01-27T11:00:00.000-08:00

You know that phenomenon when you learn a new word and then suddenly hear it being used everywhere? Well, that's sort of what my TV-watching life has been like after my last post. Since then, it seems like everything I've watched on the Disney Channel has featured someone from another teen/tween show:

The very next episode of "Naturally Sadie" that I tuned into had Shenae Grimes (Darcy from "Degrassi") on it.

Then the next two episodes of "Life with Derek" that I saw featured Lauren Collins (Paige from "Degrassi"). The episode after that? Say hello to Shane Kippel (Spinner from "Degrassi") — playing the drums, no less.

And then I saw "Get a Clue," an old Disney Channel movie starring Lindsay Lohan. Guess who else it starred: Brenda Song and Ali Mukaddam, both mentioned in my last post.

Not that I mind seeing all of these folks over and over again. In fact, it tickles me every time I recognize an old friend, for several reasons:

1) I'm giddy at my own astute ability to pick out these familiar faces (probably the only person out of her teens able to do so).
2) In the case of guest starring on other shows, I imagine how fun it must have been for those actors to be able to do something a little different for a change.
3) Strangely, I feel proud of these little guys for being so successful that they've been able to garner all of these roles. I was especially happy for Ali Mukaddam, so far the only one in my TV studies to cross over to a Disney Channel original from CTV (that's Canadian TV to you). Mazel tov!

Seeing double

2007-01-20T12:40:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited about my most recent TV discovery: a Disney Channel series called "Life with Derek." Sure, like all other Disney Channel shows, it's not exactly highbrow — or even high quality — entertainment. But I'm delighted that I happened upon it because it features a familiar face that I have missed since his other show went off the air: Michael Seater, formerly of "Strange Days at Blake Holsey High."

In case you're unfamiliar with that show, which you are probably are: it's another children's TV show, about a boarding school where all sorts of strange scientific phenomena happen. But most importantly, it's a Canadian children's TV show. Why is that a critical point for me to make? Because apparently there are only so many young actors in Canada, and they're always popping up on every show coming out of that country.

Evidence A: So Michael Seater was on "Strange Days at Blake Holsey High" and then went on to star in "Life with Derek." Big deal. This alone would not make for very convincing evidence. BUT also appearing on "Life with Derek" is Shadia Simmons, who — guess what — also had a starring role on "Strange Days at Blake Holsey High."

Evidence B: Speaking of familiar faces on "Life with Derek," I'd like to draw your attention to Kit Weyman, who plays Derek's best friend, Sam. Previously, you might have seen him on "Degrassi" as Sulley (the guy who Manny dated after her sexy makeover).

Evidence C: While we're on the topic of "Degrassi," allow me to bring up Miriam McDonald, who plays Emma. Recently, I saw her on an episode of "Naturally, Sadie," another recent Disney Channel find of mine.

Evidence D: Adding to the "Degrassi" list, I want to introduce Ali Mukaddam, who made some appearances on the show as Mohammed. (Remember him? He picked on Teri for being, ahem, large-boned.) After that, he went on to star in "Radio Free Roscoe."

Alright, I'll stop there; you get the picture. Although, now that I think about it, American children and teen TV empires are just as guilty of this. I'm talking to you, WB and Disney Channel. You want examples? See: Chad Michael Murry's appearances on the WB's "Gilmore Girls," "Dawson's Creek," and "One Tree Hill." Or Keiko Agena's appearances on "Felicity" and "Gilmore Girls." Or Jared Padalecki's appearances on "Girlmore Girls" and "Supernatural." Or Milo Ventimiglia's appearances on "Gilmore Girls" and "The Bedford Diaries." Or Brenda Song's appearances on the Disney Channel's movies "Stuck in the Suburbs" and "Wendy Wu: Homecoming Warrior" and TV shows "Phil of the Future" and "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody." Or Ashley Tisdale's appearances in the Disney Channel movie "High School Musical" and TV show "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody." Or Orlando Brown's appearances in the Disney Channel movie "Eddie's Million Dollar Cook-Off" and TV show "That's So Raven."

And those are just the ones I've personally noticed! I'm sure that if I trolled IMDB, I could find even more connections. Then again, I guess I don't have to because strangely, I spend a lot of time watching shows aimed at people a decade younger than I am. What can I say? I like mindless entertainment. I guess my blog URL says it all.

Wha? (Alternate Post Title: Worst Show Ever)

2007-01-15T02:03:00.000-08:00

Tonight, some friends and I happened to catch part of what is possibly the worst show ever on television. Granted, there are many shows that I haven't seen, and there are also many terrible shows that I have seen. But honestly, this show was really, really bad.

What could possibly draw such ire from me based on such little exposure? I'll tell you: "Assy McGee."

What is "Assy McGee," you ask? Good question. It's a show about a crime-fighting pair of buttocks. No joke. Actually, the premise has some promise to it, but the execution — oy vey.

You know what? I can't even bear to write about it any further. For some reason, I felt compelled to alert my readers (reader?) to this show's existence, but I can't go on any more. (You'll also notice the glaring lack of an image to accompany this post.) If you want more information, you can read about it on Wikipedia.

Hello and Goodbye

2007-01-11T23:15:00.000-08:00

Wow, it's been a long time since my last post. One reason is that I was back at my parents' house for the holidays and therefore TV-less for a large part of the last few weeks. The other reason is that I'm lazy. But don't worry, oh single loyal reader, because I have not foresaken this blog. Hence the "Hello" in my post title. Hello, I'm back!

The "Goodbye" in my post title, alas, is my farewell to "The OC," which Fox has recently canceled. I'm very sad to see the show go. Yes, it really went downhill over the last year or so, but it's been recovering its game recently, and I was looking forward to seeing it regain its footing and go back to delighting me as much as it did in its first season. Take tonight's episode, for example. If you didn't guffaw happily like I did when Ryan made a funny face and nodded knowingly at his girlfriend's French ex-husband, then you just have no funny bone. Sure, it was just one moment among many bland ones, but it was a step.

However, now Fox has nipped my hope in the bud, and I am not happy about it. Damn you, Fox! Isn't it bad enough that you poison the airwaves with your unfair, unbalanced news coverage? Now you have to go and take away the one quality show on your network? (Yeah, I don't watch "24.") Thanks for nothing!

Then again, at least Fox isn't the home of the new reality show "Armed & Famous." That's the one where LaToya Jackson, Jack Osbourne, Erik Estrada, and other so-called "celebrities" become actual law enforcement officers in Indiana. My God, CBS, what are you doing? And why? WHY?!

"Friday Night Lights" Shine Bright

2006-12-08T11:48:00.000-08:00

I cannot stop watching "Friday Night Lights." Back at the beginning of the season, I added it to the series manager of my DVR because the reviews were so positive, but I never felt compelled to watch. I was always jonesing for my fix of "Ugly Betty" or "Gilmore Girls," so I allowed the episodes of "Friday Night Lights" to pile up unseen, always saying to myself, "I'll get around to those another day."

Well, that day finally arrived last week when I looked at my list of saved shows and realized that new recordings were going to start saving over old ones. Hell no! Not on my watch. Thus began my "Friday Night Lights" marathon. And folks, it is awesome.

I know this isn't news to the critics or the network or probably lots of other people out there, as the ratings are good, but I want to add my vote because I know that there's at least one other person out there who's been recording the show but never getting around to watching. And if my testimonial can encourage her to start watching, then I know I'll have done some good in this world. (By the way, this isn't hypothetical. I'm talking to you, Erica.)

It's so rare to find a drama with such high-quality writing, acting, direction, camera work — everything is just stellar. My only complaint is that the storylines are a little bit on the predictable side, but that's just a minor misstep and it that doesn't detract from the overall caliber or the show — or, more importantly, my personal enjoyment of it.

Also, it doesn't hurt that Zach Gilford (playing Matt Saracen) is absolutely winning. Thank goodness he's much older than the character that he plays so that it's not creepy when I coo over him. (Yes, I checked his birthdate on IMDB, making me incredibly pathetic. So what else is new?) Funnily enough, I used to coo over Kyle Chandler (who plays Coach Taylor) back when he was on "Early Edition" and the incredibly short-lived "What About Joan." How times have changed.

"West Wing" Redux?

2006-11-27T23:51:00.000-08:00

As you all know (all five of you), I eagerly awaited the premiere of "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip." What I didn't mention on this blog was that the night that the pilot aired, I was suddenly stricken with an unexpected sense of dread. Why? Because I realized that as soon as I saw Bradley Whitford playing Danny instead of Josh Lyman, it would require that I come to terms with the fact that "The West Wing" was really, truly dead.

And at first, this was indeed the case. All I could see in Danny was the absence of Josh. It didn't help that in the inevitable comparisons to my favorite show ever, "Studio 60" overall obviously came out on the losing end. But over time, I've begun to accept Bradley Whitford's new incarnation. It doesn't hurt that he isn't making a deliberate effort to distance himself from his "West Wing" persona. (Obvious to any viewer, plus Whitford said as much in an interview with Entertainment Weekly.)

The real question in my mind is this: Is Aaron Sorkin purposefully trying to evoke the memory of shows past? Maybe he just thinks of the repeats as his own characteristic stylistic choices, which I personally think is valid. It seems unlikely that he could possibly be unaware of the fact that he's recycling his own material. I mean, come on — verbal volleys during walks through strangely convoluted hallways, offices with glass where there should be solid walls, and the clincher in tonight's episode: Matt sending Danny an important note through an assistant, prompting Danny to communicate silently with Matt from a distance via a hand gesture. "West Wing" Season 1 finale, anyone?

Not that I'm complaining. In fact, I love it! Sure, I've been a big fan of Sarah Paulson and Amanda Peet's since their days on the now defunct WB's long defunct series "Jack and Jill." And yes, just like the Chinese investor's daughter from the "Nevada Day" episodes, I have a big crush on Tom/Nate Corddry. But really, it's only the scenes with Matt and Danny bantering that truly quicken my pulse. Oh, Lemon Lyman, how I miss you. Chandler Bing — not so much.

Reunited!

2006-11-26T22:34:00.000-08:00

As a follow-up to my whiny post from yesterday, I just wanted to let everyone know that I made it safely back to New York this evening and have been spending some quality time with my DVR since my return. Funnily enough, last week's episodes of both "Ugly Betty" and "Gilmore Girls" included references to chain mail. The connections you make when you hunker down in front of the tube for hours on end...

So deprived... Must have DVR...

2006-11-25T18:04:00.000-08:00

Although I enjoy traveling to my parents' house for Thanksgiving week, one of the downsides is that they do not have cable TV. In fact, they don't have very good reception for the standard channels either. (And after an affiliate scuffle a few years ago, they didn't even have NBC until the reach from the tower was improved about a month ago.)

So in order to keep up with all my favorite shows, I am relying on my beloved DVR back in New York. But given that I fill up my 35-hour allotment with many a movie that I never get around to seeing, I'm always worried that I'm going to run out of space and that unseen shows will start recording over one another. It's happened before — luckily only to "Gilmore Girls" re-runs that I had already seen.

If Time Warner could somehow set up DVR so that I could control it remotely, I would be willing to pay a little bit more. I think other TV-philes would too. Wouldn't you love the option of DVR Plus with remote management as one of the features? The others could be an increased recording time maximum and/or ability to transfer recorded material directly onto DVD. It's a cash cow, people! Pure TV genius. Are you listening to me, Time Warner?

(Now that I think about it, are these features that Tivo already offers? Or one of the other DVR-like products? I should probably do a little research before I publish this post, but I'm too lazy. Surprise.)

Vote for Luke!

2006-11-15T22:57:00.000-08:00

"No!"
--Me after Christopher proposed to Lorelai on this week's "Gilmore Girls"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
--Me after Christopher called Lorelai "Mrs. Hayden"

You see that aghast look on their faces? That was the same expression that I had as I watched the show — except maybe with a little more disgust and less surprise. I don't know who to be angry at about this, but I am very upset.

My new career?

2006-11-13T22:18:00.000-08:00

It's that time again! The return of holiday commercials! I'm such a sucker for that smarmy stuff. But even as I tear up as Grandma draws a map with Cheerios for the most adorable baby ever, I can't help thinking to myself, "Karen, you are in the wrong profession. Appearing in holiday commercials — that's where the real money is."

As I see it, the trick is to be in a commercial with staying power. There's no point in being in a holiday commercial that only sees airtime one season before disappearing into the television ether. But what kind of commercial is guaranteed to be played year after year? A commercial for a big company, you might guess. Good idea. But I've got an even better one: the USPS.

That's right, folks — barring a national catastrophe, there will always be a United States Postal Service. And what better time for it to advertise than around the holidays? "Send gifts to your loved ones with the United States Postal Service!" A timeless message.

So, uh, yeah, if you know of any opportunities for me to be in a USPS holiday commercial, please let me know. Sure, I'm not an actress, nor am I good-looking enough for it to be worth anyone's money for me to just grace the background with my beauty. But I buy stamps occasionally, so I'd say I'm qualified. Don't you think?

She shoulda made sour grapes ice cream...

2006-11-02T23:18:00.000-08:00

On this week's episode of "Top Chef," the Quickfire Challenge was to create an ice cream flavor. The plebian masses would taste all the flavors and vote on their favorites to determine the winner.

Several of the contestants grumbled about having the proletariat as the judges, which I can understand because that was a surprise element to the challenge. I couldn't blame them for being disappointed that they had dreamt up daring, fine-dining flavors (e.g. avocadoes and bacon) when they would have probably gone with tastes with more mass appeal had they known.

However, what I cannot stand is what Emily said in response to a taster's criticism. Emily made what she described as a "calming chocolate and lavendar" ice cream flavor. Apparently, one woman said that it didn't have enough sugar. Emily's response in her confessional was, "The last thing you need with your fat ass is more sugar."

Excuse me?!

As a chef, you don't tell people that. It's not your place. And it also makes no sense. As someone who loves eating good food more than everything else in life (even TV), I am deeply, deeply offended.

Of course, it's likely that Emily didn't even mean what she said and was just speaking off the cuff out of hurt. No excuse, though. It's only natural to be defensive, but please remember that you're on a TV show, so you should really be on your best behavior. There is no reason to personally attack someone like that.

Oh, well. Emily got booted off anyway. See ya!

This PSA brought to you by the CW

2006-10-27T23:59:00.000-07:00

Though it pains me to remind loyal readers of this fact, I do watch "One Tree Hill." This probably makes me their only viewer out of high school. Which is why I'm spreading the word: In this week's episode, the CW has created the perfect public service announcement to stop kids from sharing personal information on the Internet.

The run-down: Peyton has been posting podcasts and vcasts about her life, including her experiences meeting her birth mother, then losing her birth mother to cancer. After finding out that she has a half-brother, Peyton gives him a call, and he doesn't want to talk to her. So she relates the story online and ends with a plea for her half-brother, Derek, to get in touch with her. Lo and behold, not too much later, a stranger shows up on her doorstep and says he's her brother. You can see where this is going.

But I'll spell it out for you anyway. The guy is not really her brother. He's P-S-Y-C-H-O. (Did you like how I literally spelled it out for you? I'm hilarious. That's why I have this blog. Anyway...)

Over the course of the next few episodes, fake Derek ingratiates himself with Peyton, and she's none the wiser. But in this week's eipsode, the truth comes out, and the viewer is treated to a truly terrifying segment during which fake Derek ambushes Peyton at her house (where he has cut the phone access), chases her around, literally drags her along the floor into her bedroom, and punches her in the face and otherwise physically manhandles her. When Peyton's friend, Lucas, arrives and tries to save her, fake Derek uses a taser gun on him until Lucas temporarily passes out! Eventually, fake Derek gets thrown out the window — only to disappear before the police can arrive and take him away, which means he's still out there (because apparently this episode wasn't frightening enough).

Perhaps you've seen the episode of "Degrassi: The Next Generation" in which Emma goes to meet an online predator. It was actually the pilot for the series, so I give them props for going so dark right away, but I've long felt that it wasn't scary enough to leave an impression on their audience. Now parents need look no further than "One Tree Hill." Show this thing to their kids, and they won't have to worry about their babies giving away too much information online. Of course, they'll have to tend to their children's nightmares, but that's only a natural byproduct of the best PSAs. I'll never forget one I saw when I was maybe 12, which featured scenes of people happily eating and drinking at a barbeque, followed by shots of bloody carnage after a drunk driving accident.

Anyway, if you want to check out the "One Tree Hill" segment in question, you can watch it on YouTube. Or start at the beginning of the episode here.

Now that's good TV!

2006-10-18T23:48:00.000-07:00

My God, tonight's season finale of "Project Runway" was such a nail-biter! In the past two seasons, I've thought it was fairly obvious who would win. But this time around, I kept flip-flopping until the final moments.

Personally, I thought that Jeffrey's collection was the stand-out, but based on the judge's comments, I couldn't tell whether they were leaning towards him or Uli. Even as I was listening to Heidi Klum say, "Congratulations..." I had no idea whose name was going to come out of her mouth. And then — sweet vindication!

Yes, I know that early on I named Jeffrey as my least favorite contestant, but of course as I got to see more of his personality and ostensible earnestness, my animosity declined. Not that he became my favorite person or anything. But I truly felt his collection was the best, and I was rooting for him. Unlike the rest of the nation, who apparently were dead wrong; check out the votes from Bravo's (albeit unscientific) online/phone poll:

Jeffrey..........27%
Laura...........11%
Michael........42%
Uli................20%

America, you're so dumb. I'm smart. Ha ha.

Now bring on the "Top Chef" drama, baby!

How I Love "Your Mother"

2006-10-16T22:43:00.000-07:00

Even though I got home from work dead tired tonight, barely able to keep my eyes open as I stumbled down my block, I couldn't resist watching the episode of "How I Met Your Mother" that I recorded tonight. And as always (except for that one time), I was not disappointed. Lily and Barney's cohabitation scheme. Marshall's man dates. Even a little spin of "Don't Call Me Whitney, Bobby" by Islands — during a montage no less! How is it possible that this show is so good?

"You two are just threatened because I'm a single guy moving in on your couples turf. Well, guess what — it's my territory now. I'm peeing all over brunches, fancy dinners, and musicals."
—Marshall, defending his accidental date with Brad

"You were supposed to be the vaccine, but you gave me the disease!"
—Barney, berating Lily for showing him that he could enjoy female companionship in his own home

Man oh Manny, I hate your hair!

2006-10-14T03:23:00.000-07:00

I was not at all pleased with Manny's haircut on the last season of "Degrassi." I thought it made her look old and seemed like the choice of someone either trying to hard or just going with the obvious trend or both. But believe it or not, this season's hairstyle is even worse! Seeing it on tonight's episode was awful because it was the first time this season that Manny has had a lot of close-up screen time. Oy vey, Manny, what have they done to you? You're so adorable under all that hair, I just want to take a pair of scissors and chop off the half-foot bangs and huge mane!

And while we're at it, what's up with the new opening sequence? I'm assuming they were trying to age up the credits since the characters — and presumably the audience as well — has outgrown the boppy, zooming tour around the campus. Good idea. I'm all for it. But in my opinion, the results are a miserable failure. Opening credits of "Beverly Hills, 90210," anyone?

Snuggly Betty

2006-10-12T21:57:00.000-07:00

Oh my God, I LOVE "Ugly Betty." Because of some temporary DVR hiccup, I was sadly unable to record the premiere. At first, I was just slightly disappointed; despite the fact that there was so much buzz about how good it was, I figured that it wouldn't live up to the hype because nothing ever does.

But then I watched Episode 2, and found myself delighted from the very first ping of the background music playing behind the re-cap of the previous week's show. Since then, I've been looking forward to tonight's episode with as much — nay, dare I say it, even more — anticipation than that with which I await each new episode of "Studio 60" and "Gilmore Girls." And although less wacky, tonight's episode certainly did not disappoint.

Yes, there were a few instances of predictable dialogue that I wouldn't tolerate in a less earnest show, but "Ugly Betty" obviously has the same heart of gold as its title character. Plus, a twisted sense of humor. Thank goodness the cast is so talented — in particular America Ferrara and Ana Ortiz, who swing effortlessly between sincerity and comedy, and Vanessa Williams and Michael Urie, who are able to perform the absurd with facial expressions that convey the perfect mix of seriousness and self-aware amusement.

If you haven't already caught it, watch tonight's episode online. If you have some tropical ice treat to eat along with it, even better. Personally, I recommend Ben & Jerry's Jamaican Me Crazy sorbet.

GG and SS

2006-09-26T22:39:00.000-07:00

I don't know if it was just because I was predisposed to be disappointed, but I felt like tonight's season premiere of "Gilmore Girls" was definitely missing its usual spark. Frequently, the timing seemed slightly off, the dialogue seemed a little too heavy, and the direction seemed a bit flat — but always just by one degree. Of course, this didn't prevent me from tearing up as I watched the final scene between Luke and Lorelai. Even with my favorite shows, it's not often that I physically ache out of empathy for the characters. That's a credit to Amy Sherman-Palladino, Lauren Graham, Scott Patterson, and the newbies now at the helm. Plus, there were a handful of bright comic moments to soothe my critical side (Miss Patty signalling to Kirk to drive through the red light? Brilliant!). Guess I'll just have to wait and see how the season pans out.

In other judgemental news: I'm now starting to warm up to "Studio 60." Since last week's post consisting of my initial reaction, I've watched the pilot one and a half more times and the second episode twice (except for the opening musical number, which I've seen thrice).

I decided to re-watch the pilot because I thought that perhaps I had given it short shrift the first time around and wanted to give it a second chance. And it turns out that I did enjoy the episode more upon a second viewing. Deliberately opening my mind and also free of having to figure out who all the characters were and to piece together their relationships to one another, I was able to let myself get absorbed in the narrative. And I liked it.

Of course, "Studio 60" is still nowhere close to "The West Wing" in my heart, but I would not be one bit surprised if it made its way up there in time. The early evidence? You read the part where I said I had watched the second episode twice, right? It only aired for the first time last night, so I think that's really saying something. Already, the "Studio 60" world is becoming a safe, comforting haven. Good job, Aaron Sorkin. How could I have doubted you?

Btw, Aaron, while I'm having a one-sided conversation with you, can you tell me why you're so obsessed with Gilbert and Sullivan? Don't think I don't remember your use of their music on "The West Wing." That reminds me — I've got "Topsy-Turvy" saved on my DVR...

A Definite Hair Don't

2006-09-25T22:06:00.000-07:00

What is up with Scott Bakula's hair?!

I don't get it. Is he supposed to look attractive? Either I'm way off base or the stylist for "The New Adventures of Old Christine" needs to be fired. Right?

Two Thumbs Up (both from me) for "Handy Manny"

2006-09-24T11:19:00.000-07:00

After quickly exhausting all the new episodes of "Wonder Pets" back in the spring, I've been too consumed with other TV to watch any children's shows. But this morning I discovered "Handy Manny" on Playhouse Disney, and I'm loving it.

Before tuning in, all I knew was that Wilmer Valderrama was somehow involved. Although I of course loved him as Fez on "That '70s Show," his celebrity party antics didn't exactly engender confidence in what he would bring to an offering for kids. But he's actually really adorable as the voice of Manny, the go-to fix-it guy in a small, friendly town. Although at first I found his husky, grown-up voice to be jarring — particularly for a children's show, which normally features clear, announcer-like voices — I quickly came to appreciate the warm, avuncular tone that he used for communicating with his pack of unruly tools.

Unruly tools, you ask? Sure! You wouldn't expect the tools on a show like this to be inanimate, would you? As described by a Disney press release, the tools are "Pat, the bumbling hammer, Turner, a grumpy screwdriver, Felipe, a very ambitious screwdriver, Dusty, the not-so-dainty hand saw, Stretch, the nearly perfect tape measure, Squeeze, a curious pair of pliers and Rusty, a fearful monkey wrench." So far, my favorites are Rusty and Felipe, both of whom feature some of that New York neurosis we can all identify with.

Overall, "Handy Manny" doesn't seem as sharp and quirky as "Wonder Pets," so there's less for an adult to enjoy. But I can definitely appreciate how appealing the show would be for kids, and that makes it a pleasure to watch. Plus, you haven't lived until you've watched a bunch of CG tools chasing escaped bunnies around a pet store.

Will I ever ABC these shows again? Only time will tell.

2006-09-21T23:04:00.000-07:00

You may be surprised to learn that I somehow managed to avoid being drawn into "Grey's Anatomy." Despite all the hype, I was never interested. I even watched part of one random episode and felt absolutely no draw. But all of that changed tonight. Or did it?

Ingenious ABC put together an hour of clips from last season, and when a show consists entirely of highlights, how can you resist that? Of course, I got dragged into watching the season premiere over the next hour. A woman grieving over the sudden death of her fiance. The famed romance between Meredith and McDreamy. What more could I ask for?

Well, I could ask for a hospital drama not to devolve into ridiculous storylines like, say, the plague. And I could ask for a show about serious issues to be complex and textured and finely acted, directed, and written rather than melodramatic all the way around. But I guess that would be asking too much, if the success of "Grey's Anatomy" is any indication. I know Sandra Oh is terrific, but surely the few moments that she is on screen are not enough to justify the massive following that this show has.

Oh, well. Guess I'll have to tune in next week to find out! Because, yes, I can feel it — I'm on the verge of being hooked. I'm not there quite yet, not willing to program the DVR for this stuff. But if my gradual loyalty to the terrible but delightful "Windfall" has taught me anything, it's that I can't write off a show just because its low quality makes it painful to watch. Apparently, I have bad taste just like the rest of the population.

And as if to prove it, now I'm getting almost hooked on "Six Degrees" too! Whoever put this thing after "Grey's Anatomy" is a programming genius. Even though I'm aware that I've been tricked into watching it, I still can't turn it off. We really are prisoners of human nature, huh?

On a lighter note, here's a fun game to play with "Six Degrees": try to connect the lead actors to one another in six degrees or fewer. With ads for the show splashed all over the subway these days, it's a nice way to pass the time during your commute. The easiest link is Hope Davis to Campbell Scott, as they were in the movie "The Secret Lives of Dentists" together. For this reason, if you can connect any of the other actors to one of them, you get an automatic connection to the other. But I would encourage you not to use this cheat. Makes it more challenging that way. (By the way, if you can play this game with a friend, you get the added pleasure of being surprised by the films and shows she chooses for her connections. For example, my friend utilized the movie "Dying Young" for the Campbell Scott-Julia Roberts connection. How's that for an oldie but goodie?)

Say It Ain't So, Jon!

2006-09-20T23:48:00.000-07:00

I love "The Daily Show" as much as anyone — in fact, it's often the reliably pleasant high point of my day — but does anyone else feel that it's gone a bit downhill lately?

At first, I thought maybe it was just a temporary slump, but as time goes on and the episodes come and go, I'm beginning to worry that my beloved show is going the way of "SNL" when it lost all its star comedians. I mean, these new correspondents are just not that funny.

On the other hand, I'm happy to see that "The Colbert Report" seems to be getting better and better. In my opinion, it got off to a shaky start, but now it seems to have found its TV legs. Maybe now I'll actually start sticking around after "The Word" on a regular basis. (Or maybe I spoke too soon. Tonight's high school segment is kind of disturbing.)

Of course, the best part of this Comedy Central double-header in my opinion is the banter between Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert at the end of "The Daily Show." Someone force these guys to do a reunion special, please!

Holy cow, I have readers!

2006-09-20T23:25:00.000-07:00

I just want to take a moment to thank barry and lace for leaving comments on my blog. I honestly believed that no one was reading this drivel except for a select few TV-loving friends of mine, so it's nice to know that I've given at least two strangers an opportunity to waste their time. Stay tuned for even more horse poop in the future! Love, Karen

Yes and No

2006-09-18T23:41:00.000-07:00

Tonight's season premiere of "How I Met Your Mother" = awesome. Not the full-on powerhouse that it was last season (except for the unfortunate episode where Barney tricked Ted into thinking his date was a hooker), but still awesome.

Tonight's series premiere of "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip" = not awesome. It was smart, of course, but felt cold and empty. I'm sure that my disappointment was inevitable because of the sheer height of my expectations. I don't know, maybe it's just too soon to ask me to let go of "The West Wing." With that in mind, I'll withhold judgment for now. Perhaps, like Marshall, I simply need some time to heal, move on, and make some pancakes.

A reminder from your friends at "I Love TV"

2006-09-17T21:48:00.000-07:00

Don't forget to set your DVR to record "Studio 60" tomorrow night! Or, you know, you could watch it live. But then you'd have to deal with commercials, and with so many season and series premieres this week, who has time for that? Not me!

"Six Feet Under" Lives!

2006-09-13T23:10:00.000-07:00

Given that I'm a TV junkie, you may be surprised to learn that I don't have premium cable. With all the other shows that I have to keep me busy, I haven't been able to justify the additional cost since living on my own. But when I had roommates, we did spring for the extra channels, including HBO. And like any good HBO consumers, the four of us were always eager to get our weekly fix of "Six Feet Under."

In giving up HBO, I had to forsake "Six Feet Under," but I've now learned that Bravo is going to be syndicating it starting October 2. AWESOME! Now if only Bravo could find a way to actually revive both "Six Feet Under" and "The West Wing" instead of just showing re-runs...

(Btw, yes, you did read that correctly — I was in fact living with three other people at one point. You can guess why I'm living alone now.)

"The Hill" Gives 'em Hell

2006-09-13T22:47:00.000-07:00

If you read my earlier post on the Sundance Channel's reality series "The Hill," then you know that I was hesitant to commit to watching regularly because of the emotional trauma that I experienced as I watched the pilot's coverage of the 2004 presidential election. But since then, I've tuned in for a few more episodes, and now I'm a full fan.

It's actually really fascinating the way that the show has been structured. Rather than the entire thing centering around a continuing narrative, each episode focuses on revealing the machinations of one Congress member's office in response to relatively recent major political events. Episode 2 covers social security reform and the CIA leak, Episode 3 covers the nomination of John Roberts for Supreme Court justice, and Episode 4 (which aired tonight), covers Hurricane Katrina. I'm disappointed that there will be only six episodes, what with all the wacky shit that this universe — not to mention this administration — comes up with.

As you can imagine, it's really interesting to see what was going on behind the scenes when those issues were big in the news cycle. But even better than the sneak peek aspect is the fact that you learn things that were never part of the media reports — in some cases, information that seems so critical I wonder why no one made a big deal of making the public aware of it. Unfortunately, I can't think of an example to share because I watched Episodes 2 and 3 around 2:00 a.m. Saturday night/Sunday morning.

Why the night owl viewing? A friend of mine who goes to law school in DC and has interned on the Hill herself was in town over the weekend. Because she doesn't have the Sundance Channel, she can't partake in the pleasure of "The Hill" the show, so I saved up a couple of episodes on my DVR for us to watch together. Because of our busy schedule, we didn't get around to watching them until after a long day of shopping, sushi, and swigs (at a bar — so I wanted to go with the alliteration, so sue me!). Surprisingly, even when exhausted, I was completely engaged by "The Hill." Of course, our ability to concentrate on the show might have also had something to do with the sugar in the two pints of Ben & Jerry's that we downed while watching... Regardless, truly excellent TV.

NBC Fall Preview = Snoozefest

2006-09-03T12:07:00.000-07:00

Maybe I shouldn't make such a sweeping generalization as to say that the entire NBC Fall Preview Show tonight was a snoozefest; truth be told, I didn't really pay attention to most of it. Really, I just tuned in because of my excitement about Aaron Sorkin's "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip."

Unfortunately, NBC didn't seem to think that their Fall Preview Show merited true previews, instead showing a series of slick advertisements. Yawn.

Of course, I know I could always find real previews online, from clips to scripts. In fact, this fantastic blog dedicated entirely to "Studio 60" has some great leads on where to find such tidbits. But now I think I'm just going to tough it out until the show makes its official debut. I'm constantly being disappointed when I allow my expectations to creep too high, so I think it's best not to feed my anticipation of "Studio 60." Btw, if you think I was being facetious in my word choice ("tough it out"), you're only half-right. Hey, when you're a TV junkie with no life or interests other than the tube, two weeks is a long time to wait for the follow-up to your favorite show!

Dear Giada, how can I get your life?

2006-08-29T21:48:00.000-07:00

Although quality certainly matters to me when it comes to eating, there's still nothing that quite compares to the euphoria I feel when faced with massive amounts of food, for example at all-you-can-eat buffets. Surprise — I'm a glutton! What's that you say? You're not surprised? Well, congratulations on your powers of inference; now shut up.

Anyway, given my happiness at seeing a well-laid spread, I was of course delighted to discover "Behind the Bash," new to the Food Network this season. Giada De Laurentiis follows the preparations for big celebrations like a benefit for the NYFD thrown by Dennis Leary or a Grammy after party.

I fully expected to spend the last few minutes of each episode salivating over the reveal of the banquet tables. But surprisingly, I found that I was rarely that impressed with what I saw. I think that the cinematography is mostly to blame, as the shots of the party itself never seem to provide a satisfyingly close view of the food — and definitely not the lingering, and I'm sure loving bordering on obsessive, gaze that I would give to everything.

However, the episode that I saw most recently was an exception. In the episode, Giada took the viewer behind the bash to celebrate the 40th anniversary of "Days of Our Lives." I was a little bored with the time she spent going through the wardrobe closet and checking out the set. But the food, oh, the food! Seeing the abundant vittles being scooped onto partygoers' plates, I let out several involuntary exclamations. And had to restrain myself from clenching my fists and shaking them at the TV in violent envy of Giada's life.

Then I noticed something that gave me a little bit of hope; I recognized Giada's husband and best friend from the "Chefography" episode that covered her life. They were hanging out at the party with Giada! So now I have a new goal in life: to seek out a friend who can open up this world of culinary pleasure to me. Not to be desparate, but if you know anyone, um, please send them my way.

Bye, bye, Billy!

2006-08-27T22:43:00.000-07:00

Like any red-blooded woman, I love watching the pre-award show specials where the networks give us a chance to size up all the stars' dresses. However, next time, I am considering watching with my TV on mute. Why? Because Billy Bush is possibly the most incompetent improvisational celebrity interviewer ever.

Look, I'm sure it's an extremely high-stress situation for him and the other hosts. But you would think that since this is his job, he wouldn't be so visibly awkward, making his segments completely unenjoyable to watch and leaving me counting the seconds until he throws it over to someone else. Yes, Nancy O'Dell has her own share of uncomfortable moments (see: Warren Beatty and Annette Bening), but she seems infinitely more polished than poor Billy. If only the cameras had stayed with Tim Gunn and Maria Menounos the whole hour, given that the Emmy Awards are all about honoring quality television and all.

(Although given the somewhat motley crew of nominees this year, I guess maybe I should put a qualification on that last statement and say that the Emmy Awards are ostensibly all about honoring quality television. Where the hell is the much-deserved nomination for "The Gilmore Girls," I ask you.)

Just Beachy

2006-08-26T14:52:00.000-07:00

Today I got a wonderful TV surprise: I noticed that a couple of "Laguna Beach" episodes would be on in just a few minutes, and I thought it would be good background noise while I got dressed and otherwise made myself presentable to the public. I assumed they would be episodes I had already seen from the second season. But apparently, unbeknownst to me, the new season of "Laguna Beach" started a couple weeks ago. So what did I see when I tuned in? A new cast of characters just waiting to delight me with their ridiculous antics. Hooray!

So far, I'd have to say that the clique war lined up for this season is looking very promising. This time around, it seems that the producers have done an excellent job of pitting a group of totally unsympathetic girls against a gang of likeable kids (even though the central character's naivete does grate on me the tiniest bit). I think it makes the drama much more enjoyable to watch when there are characters the viewer can clearly root for and against. Of course, I like finely shaded complexity in some of my entertainment (e.g. my forever favorite "The West Wing"), but this is "Laguna Beach," for heaven's sake. Bring on the soap operatics!

Here's the only thing I don't understand: why does everyone think Cameron is so hot? Yes, I can see that he obviously works out, but I just don't see the draw. Then again, he is about a decade younger than I am, so maybe that has something to do with it.

"The Hill" Makes Me Ill (through no fault of its own)

2006-08-23T22:34:00.000-07:00

If you're a loyal reader of my blog (which, granted, is impossible because I have no readers, but just hypothetically), then you know that I love "The West Wing" more than all other TV shows. So, of course, I tuned in to the premiere of "The Hill" on Sundance tonight to check it out. The show follows the staffers of Congressman Robert Wexler (D-FL), providing just the kind of political behind-the-scenes look that should enthrall me.

And in one sense, it does. I'm totally engaged by the fast-paced maneuvering on screen. But at the same time, I'm totally depressed. The first episode is all about the lead-up to the 2004 presidential election, and for some reason these poor saps really think that Kerry is going to win. It's awful to watch their optimism knowing that they are wrong. In particular, the close-up shot of the Kerry-Edwards sign on the front lawn of Wexler's Chief of Staff reminds me of the Kerry-Edwards signs I fruitlessly passed out in Pennsylvania probably around the same time that this episode was shot.

Even so, I'm going to give "The Hill" another try next week. After all, the fact that it left me with a sinking feeling verging on nihilism is no reflection on the quality of the show itself. I guess that's the double-edged sword of reality TV — at least reality TV where the action is not completely orchestrated by producers: viewers are treated to the voyeurism that they ask for, but that means they are also denied the escapism that makes most TV watching so delightful. Plus, you can't count on the beautiful narrative arcs and sharp dialogue that Aaron Sorkin provides. If only we lived in his world. I bet Wexler's staff would like that too.

So You Think You Can Create a Good Reality Competition Show?

2006-08-03T22:35:00.000-07:00

Given the amount of time I spend parked in front of my TV, you might think that I would have seen "So You Think You Can Dance" before tonight. But no, I never felt any inclination whatsoever. In fact, I didn't even bother to give it more than a moment's thought, so I actually thought that it was a celebrity dancing competition show a la "Dancing with the Stars." I know: shame on me.

Anyway, the show happened to be on when I turned on the TV this evening, so of course I got sucked in. But I can confidently say that I will not become a regular viewer of this series (unlike my continuing guilty pleasure "Windfall"). There are so many things wrong with it, the overall experience is pretty poor.

Most notably, why do they have such a loud audience? When I watch people dance, I like to hear the music that their movements are choreographed to, not the screams of adolescents.

And Mary Murphy, please don't speak ever again. Thank goodness for DVR, which allowed me to fast forward through her inane commentaries.

And who the hell is Cat Deeley? (That's a rhetorical question. I know she's some sort of model/VJ, but why oh why is she hosting this show? Way to be awkward, lady.)

But even with its faults, this show does have one thing that makes it stand out above the others of its kind: real heart. Or, at least, the contestants have heart — I don't know about the producers. It's obvious that these kids have really bonded and care about one another, which is nice to see. And if it's all an act, I don't care. Why not? Two reasons:

1) I much prefer to see competitors who are good sports over competitors who are vicious, no matter what the television networks think.

2) I won't be watching this show ever again anyway.

Speaking of which, here's what I really don't understand: how my TV happened to be on Fox when I turned it on tonight. When I leave in the morning, it's always on NBC because I watch "The Today Show" while I get ready. So how did it get onto this other channel? Darn that Fox; I thought it was just their news that was fishy, but there really is some sort of larger conspiracy.

A "Degrassi" gift from the gods

2006-07-28T21:14:00.000-07:00

Best. News. Ever.

Over the next five weekends, the N is showing every episode of "Degrassi" in existence in order! Of course, I've already seen every episode of "Degrassi" in existence, but I'm so excited for all of the people out there who will be able to enjoy these marathons. Especially a couple friends of mine (I believe I've mentioned them before) who are just getting into "Degrassi" now and are often coming to me for back stories that they need in order to fully make sense of current plotlines.

AND, as if that weren't enough to bring tears of joy to any true "Degrassi" fan's eye, I believe they're also going to be showing the episode where Manny has an abortion, which has never been aired in the United States before. Gasp!

Hello, my lost love!

2006-07-25T21:37:00.000-07:00

When I got home from work today with a full-on gross cold, I just wanted to sack out on my futon and watch something totally comforting on TV. Unfortunately, I had exhausted the arsenal of Food Network shows that I had recorded over the weekend, and none of the movies fit the bill (a representative sampling of the serious fare I had to choose from: "The Secret Lives of Dentists," "Frida," and "Hoop Dreams"). I briefly flirted with watching a Harry Potter film on DVD, but even that seemed like it might be too gripping for illness viewing. All seemed lost. But then, I stumbled upon the perfect solution!

I noticed that Bravo was showing none other than "The West Wing," my favorite show in the world! (And since I obviously watch a lot of TV, you know that it's saying something for me to single out one show.)

It's been a long time since I've seen "The West Wing" because there are no more new episodes (alas, not just summer hiatus but a permanent loss). And since I've already seen pretty much every episode that exists at least once, I haven't felt any urge to keep up with Bravo's repeats. But seeing it again tonight — even just the partial episode that I caught — reminded me of just how fantastic it is. Granted, I haven't seen every show in the universe, but I truly believe that there is not one that is smarter and more enthralling than "The West Wing." Even when you're sniffling, coughing, and fighting off a fever.

Viva Bartlett forever!

Well done, Bobby Flay -- and I'm not talking about steak

2006-07-22T22:54:00.000-07:00

Food Network junkie that I am, I really love some of the new additions to their line-up. One such new show is "Throwdown with Bobby Flay," in which the famous chef challenges relative unknowns to cooking competitions on their own turf. The episodes that I've seen so far have pitted Bobby Flay against a wedding cake maker, a guy who owns a chowder restaurant, and a military man who cooks steak in 100-degree desert heat.

One aspect of the show that I really like is seeing Bobby Flay as a real person. Ever since watching his pompous performance on "The Iron Chef" (original Japanese version) a few years ago, I've been decidedly anti-Flay. Even Bobby Flay's brief appearance in a delightful Disney Channel movie (about a kid who is torn between cooking and playing baseball, in case you were wondering) did nothing to improve my negative opinion. But, though I am stubborn as all get-out, I think the tide is starting to turn in Bobby's favor these days, thanks to "Throwdown." Maybe it's just because he's going up against people who specialize in areas of cooking that are not his strengths, but "Throwdown" shows a humble side of Bobby Flay that was totally missing when he did his stand-on-the-cutting-board stunt on "The Iron Chef." It's nice to see. (For a description of this event and a full screed against the man, check out this lovely article.)

I also enjoy seeing how excited the other chefs get when Bobby Flay appears out of the blue. But at the same time, I always feel bad for them because I know that they're about to go up against a chef who has much more professional experience than they do. See, these poor people think that the Food Network is filming them for their own TV specials; they don't realize that they're really pawns in the "Throwdown" producers' game and that Bobby Flay is the true star of the show. It just makes me a little sad because if I were in their position, I would feel disappointed upon the reveal. Of course, they are all very gracious and seem to view Bobby Flay's mere presence as an honor, so maybe I'm off base here.

Also, it strikes me as kind of bizarre that the premise of the show has the viewer rooting against the star. Again, maybe it's just me, but I would think that everyone would cheer for the underdog, in this case, the chef being challenged by Bobby Flay. Especially since, in addition to the surprise element, Bobby Flay also has the advantage of being able to bring his own ingredients. (In my opinion, this was especially critical in the steak challenge against the military guy who had a much more limited "pantry," so to speak, to work with.)

Oh, well. Despite these weird aspects of the viewing experience, "Throwdown" somehow works. So, way to go, Bobby Flay. Keep it up, and maybe you'll win me over yet.

What? Do all blondes look the same to you?

2006-07-22T09:22:00.000-07:00

So, I was watching "E! News," and they had a segment on LC, formerly from "Laguna Beach," currently from "The Hills." During the segment, the voiceover declared that Lauren and Kristin (nemeses from "Laguna Beach" days) don't always see eye to eye. But then they showed a clip of Lauren scolding Heidi, her roommate on "The Hills"! Yes, both Kristin and Heidi have short, blonde hair and a viewer cannot make out Heidi's face in the clip, but come on, E! For a network purportedly all about the entertainment industry, shouldn't someone have caught that Kristin and Heidi are not in fact the same person?

Jeffrey = already my least favorite "Project Runway" contestant

2006-07-20T19:30:00.000-07:00

Oh my God, I hate Jeffrey on "Project Runway." He just said of Angela, "I have one word for you to sum her up: feminazi."

What. The. Hell.

First of all, hearing a man whom I already consider to be an ass say that that really makes me angry because it is just another reminder of the number of ignorant people out there who think it's okay to make gender the focus of a put-down. I can't quite articulate why it makes me so furious. It brings to mind people who said that women can't be world leaders because they get hormonal when they menstruate. Or the concept of the hysterical female. Ooh, it just outrages me!

But secondly — and even more annoyingly — once again, Jeffrey's insult makes no sense. Yes, Angela seems like a truly aggravating character from what I can tell, but it has nothing to do with being a rabid feminist. Jeffrey, you're an idiot.

Nerdiest use of a DVR ever

2006-07-15T22:20:00.000-07:00

Because I am perhaps the biggest dork in the universe, I just experienced what I consider to be a very exciting double feature, thanks to my DVR. Through what I imagine to be serendipitous programming, two different versions of "The Importance of Being Earnest" were on TV this morning, one on TCM and one on IFC. I recorded them both, then settled down this evening for a fun four hours of compare and contrast. (What? I already admitted that I'm the biggest dork in the universe.)

In my experiment watching the 1952 and 2002 movies back-to-back, I thought one would stand out as better than the other — given my fondness for old movies, I put my odds on the 1952. However, my final verdict is that there is no clear overall winner. BUT there were clear strengths and weaknesses in each film. Not that you care, but here is a list of some of what I deem to be the highlights:

-1952's Dorothy Tutin is hands down the superior Cecily. Sorry, Reese Witherspoon. I know you won the Oscar for your performance in "Walk the Line" (which was very good), but you can't hold a candle to Dorothy Tutin in this role. Whereas you just seem like you, she comes across as natural and appealing — and perhaps most importantly for the story, a sparkling young girl.

-2002's Anna Massey as Miss Prism. Whoever came up with the hilarious walk that she exhibits is a comic genius. I still remember that watching her run away from Lady Bracknell was the highlight of my experience seeing the movie on the big screen when it first came out.

-2002's Judi Dench as Lady Bracknell, of course. 1952's Edith Evans was good, but Judi Dench — come on, now.

-1952's tea scene between Cecily and Gwendolen. The subtle verbal catfight between the two ladies should be required watching for all actresses.

-2002's tea scene tussle between Jack and Algy. And that's a high compliment from me because when I think back on reading the play well before seeing either movie, my delight over this scene's exchange about muffins still stands out.

-2002's Colin Firth. That's all I have to say on this subject. I just love Colin Firth.

The "Project Runway" Diaries: The End

2006-07-12T20:29:00.000-07:00

Well, that about does it for my first — and I'm sure my last — (almost) real-time "Project Runway" commentary. If even a single fellow "Project Runway" fan enjoys it, then all my frenzied typing will have been worth it. Of course, in order for that to happen, my readership would have to increase from absolutely zip to at least one. Maybe someday.

Btw, in case you somehow failed to gather this, I live on the East Coast. The Blogger default timestamp seems to be set to Pacific Time. There's probably some way to change that, but in case you couldn't guess by the massive amount of time I spend parked on my futon, I'm incredibly lazy, so I haven't tried to figure it out. I say all this because I want to make it clear that I was not somehow using my psychic powers to comment on TV that hadn't aired yet. Just add three hours to the post times, you numbskulls.

(Yes, this is how I plan to win over potential regular readers: by calling them names. A sound marketing plan, if I ever saw one.)

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #14

2006-07-12T20:17:00.000-07:00

Tim Gunn was wrong? How is this possible?

In all seriousness, I'm really surprised that the winning garment was one that Tim had criticized so strongly. I hope he speaks to this on his blog later.

Also, poor Stacey. I really liked her piece! I do understand what the judges were saying about it seeming like she just ran out of time; if only she had been able to put a nice lining in, not only would she have avoided that particular comment, but she probably could have added another facet to the design. Not that I know that I'm talking about at all. And yet, that won't stop me from saying that I disagree with Michael Kors' disapproval of the fit on top. Are you listening to me, celebrated fashion designer? Although I am totally unqualified to do so, I have a bone to pick with you!

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #13

2006-07-12T19:56:00.000-07:00

These early fashion shows are the best. There are just so many pieces to look at! Obviously, I wouldn't change the competition premise of the show, but I wish there were a way to see lots of garments every time. Maybe the producers could force eliminated contestants to continue creating clothes for all the challenges and post the results on the web site. They could even invite visitors to the site to vote on whether they like any of the eliminated contestants' offerings better than the garments by the designers still in the running. They're already doing such great things with their site and with cell phones (ring tones, text messages) — I seriously think this feature would be a great addition. I'm a genius.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #12

2006-07-12T19:50:00.000-07:00

Jeffrey just called everyone else's work "remedial, intermediate bullshit."

How can anything be both "remedial" and "intermediate"? If you're going to be a cocky jerk, at least try to construct your insults so that they make sense.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #11

2006-07-12T19:42:00.000-07:00

Wow, this season's contestants got off pretty lucky compared to last season's. I'd prefer ripping apart material from Atlas Studios over ripping apart my own clothes any day. Not that I have any really valuable items in my wardrobe; I'm just a covetous person. Buddha would be very disappointed in me.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #10

2006-07-12T19:35:00.000-07:00

Love this Robert character. Though it may be too soon to say, I think he may be my favorite from this season. (Noticing a trend in my picks? I think I neglected to mention that Nick vied with Dan for the top spot in my heart last time around.)

Be warned: I'm envisioning future posts with "Robert Best is the best!" as the title.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #9

2006-07-12T19:33:00.000-07:00

Oh, God, Laura just rhymed "fashion" and "passion." She deserves to be kicked off just for that.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #8

2006-07-12T19:31:00.000-07:00

Oh, it's Jay! Hi, Jay! Forget Danny V — you'll always be my first "Project Runway" love!

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #7

2006-07-12T19:22:00.000-07:00

Good job, editors! I LOVE montages, and NOTHING beats a montage of quick rejections. America is all about the schadenfreude, no?

Although I must say that one reason I really love "Project Runway" is that it's one of the few competitive reality shows that isn't focused on people making fools of themselves. Supposedly, this season they have even more talented designers, which I take as a sign that the show will not forsake its roots anytime soon.

(Btw, I hope everyone is giving me due props for working a German word into my commentary. I think Heidi would be pleased.)

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #6

2006-07-12T19:03:00.000-07:00

Oh, how I love Danny V! I actually saw him in Central Park a few months ago. As luck would have it, I was with a friend who is also obsessed with "Project Runway," and she's actually the one who spotted him first. Then, of course, we proceeded to stare at the poor guy in order to figure out if perhaps it was just our eyes deceiving us. Fortunately for us, he and his companions settled down in a spot not too far from us. Even more fortunately, the sun shifted not too much later, and my friend and I jumped at the opportunity to use that as an excuse as we repositioned ourselves in a location that allowed for improved viewing (much to my friend's boyfriend's chagrin).

Of course, I tried to stop myself from being obvious when I looked at the fellow, but I got in enough surreptitious (I hope!) peeks so that when my friend asked how certain I was that it was the adorable Danny V before us, I could say that l was 97% sure. Moments later, however, I changed my answer to 100% when he was joined by his model from the show, Rebecca. Hello! Total joy for me and my friend upon her arrival!

The only disappointing aspect of this episode was that Dan didn't have his hair in a half-ponytail, which had always caused me to gleefully exclaim, "I love his half-ponytail!" — annoying the above-mentioned friend to no end when we watched together. However, I was somewhat mollified by the fact that when Rebecca arrived, she was with a guy who had his hair in a half-ponytail. Maybe they travel in packs.

Fun fact: I've only ever seen three reality show celebs in real reality. In order, they are:

-CT from "The Real World: Paris," spotted outside a bar in SoHo

-Danny V from "Project Runway," spotted as described above

-Funnily enough, Kara Janx also from "Project Runway," spotted walking down Prince St., I believe between Mott and Mulberry, or maybe it was between Mott and Elizabeth...

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #5

2006-07-12T18:58:00.000-07:00

I wish they had let the viewer know when Heidi was wearing one of Kara Saun's designs on Season 2. Did they not think we'd want to know?

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #4

2006-07-12T18:44:00.000-07:00

Interesting, I never knew that black was one of the most challenging colors to work with. I would have thought the opposite, but I guess that goes to show you how very little I know about clothing design.

Still, it's curious to me because I always think of black as a wardrobe staple. That's not just me, right? Granted, on several occasions when I've gone shopping with one of my friends she has scolded me, saying, "If I see something black hanging on the rack, I just know you're going to look at it." But black is a basic for everyone, isn't it? If only Tim Gunn were here to set me straight.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #3

2006-07-12T18:40:00.000-07:00

Michael Kors is absolutely tittering at Bradley's sketches! I hope this is a sign of giggles yet to come on Season 3!

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #2

2006-07-12T18:35:00.000-07:00

These bio videos are awesome! In particular, I hope someone posts this Barbie ventriloquism act on YouTube. I would love to see it in its wacky entirety.

The "Project Runway" Diaries, #1

2006-07-12T18:33:00.000-07:00

If Entertainment Weekly doesn't include this in their next issue's TV Sound Bites, you'll know that they've fallen down on the job:

"If Vincent Van Gogh had my personality, he might not have had to cut off his ear."
—the ever so modest Santino Rice

At least he had the humility to laugh after saying it.

The "Project Runway" Diaries

2006-07-12T18:20:00.000-07:00

I love love love "Project Runway" and have been looking forward to tonight's casting special and season premiere ever since I first spied the posters in the subway station. Although, given my fervor for this show, it might actually be more accurate to say that I've been looking forward to tonight's casting special and season premiere since the end of Season 2.

To celebrate, I thought I'd try my hand at blog commentary in almost real-time as I watch. Let's see how it goes, shall we?

OMG -- I have the TV-watching habits of a high schooler!

2006-07-09T18:22:00.000-07:00

Normally, I avoid watching MTV's "My Super Sweet 16" because the whining of those spoiled kids makes me really furious. However, for some reason, I ended up watching an episode earlier today; I guess I was intrigued by the Cirque du Soleil type acts that this particular girl, Nicole, was planning to have at her party. They almost lost me when Nicole forced her two closest friends to try on various dresses so that she could dictate what they would wear to the event, but I held on — and boy, am I glad that I did. Because what did I see just a few minutes later? A familiar face that brought me much, much joy.

Nicole and her aforementioned friends were auditioning models to be part of Nicole's grand entrance to the party, and I noticed that one of them looked a lot like Ryder from the Puerto Rico season of The N's reality show "Girls v. Boys." At first, I thought I must be mistaken, but then Nicole said, "Ryder's not hot enough to be at my party." That's when I knew it really was him — and how delighted I was!

Since I'm sure you never watched the Puerto Rico season of "Girls v. Boys" (as it was, like, the third season of what I'm sure was a struggling show anyway), I have to give you the 411, as the kids say. (Btw, do the kids actually still say "the 411"? I guess I should know since I seem to watch the same TV shows as teenagers, but I really have no idea.) Poor Ryder did not fare well on "G v B." It wasn't that he was incompetent; rather, it was his personality that was the problem. His team voted him off even though he was the best athlete, and they did not hold back when insulting him during their confessionals. So for me to hear Nicole rejecting Ryder as not hot enough for her party, well, my heart went out to the kid. Actually, no it didn't. I mean, I did feel bad for him because I'm sure he's going to watch "My Super Sweet 16" and be hurt to hear that and it will surely be embarrassing that everyone else who watches the episode will hear it as well. However, mostly I found the whole thing hilarious.

Even funnier is the fact that people are talking about this on The N's message boards. To be accurate, I should actually say that kids are talking about this on The N's message boards. And that's really what's at the core of what tickles me about this whole thing. Only high schoolers should have had this experience. And yet, there I was, a supposed adult scooting to the edge of my futon and wondering, "Wait! Was that who I think it was?" then giggling when I realized that indeed it was. If I were ever to go undercover as a high school student a la Drew Barrymore's character in "Never Been Kissed," I would surely succeed like no one's business.

So I watch more TV than a normal person. So what?

2006-06-30T19:38:00.000-07:00

My combined passion for food and amazing stomach capacity has been part of my reputation at work for a while. But I guess now people are starting to catch on that I have a second, almost competing love — also known as television.

Exhibit A: a conversation with one of my co-workers

Co-worker: I don't have Tivo, but I have something like Tivo.
Me: DVR?
Co-worker: No, it's not DVR, it's something else. I love it.
Me: How many recorded hours does it hold?
Co-worker: Oh, lots!
Me [getting excited because maybe I want to switch to this product]: Really? Because I only get 35 hours with DVR.
Co-worker: [unbridled laughter] Oh, I think it's actually a lot less than that.
Me [trying to look like I'm not the extreme couch potato that I have just revealed myself to be]: Oh.

I've fallen for "Windfall" -- much to my chagrin

2006-06-29T20:15:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it. "Windfall" actually has me hooked.

I tuned in to the pilot because of all the hype, but it was so bad that I ended up turning it off partway through. The next week, I happened to catch the tail end of the episode when I turned on the TV; of course, the previews of the upcoming episode intrigued me, so I purposefully watched it the next week. But once again, I couldn't stand to make it all the way through and ended up giving up three quarters of the way through.

And yet, today when I saw a commercial for it earlier in the evening, I couldn't resist — I programmed my DVR to record tonight's episode. And in pressing the buttons on my remote, something clicked. I finally came to terms with the fact that I enjoy "Windfall." Even if the show is sometimes so painfully poor that I turn it off in disgust, I just keep coming back for more. And the act of programming the recording into my DVR was proof that I could not deny.

So what did I do next? Changed the programming to record not just tonight's episode but the entire series. My God, what have I come to?

Lifetime cracks me up

2006-06-24T23:05:00.000-07:00

I just saw a hilarious commercial on Lifetime. The entirety of the commercial consisted of the following:

"Mom at Sixteen" and "Too Young to Be a Dad." Buy the double feature today on DVD.

Priceless. So priceless, in fact, that I don't want to ruin the delight with commentary. Just bask in its many levels of — what I can only imagine is unintended — comedy.

Syndication and the City

2006-06-21T19:14:00.000-07:00

Last night I was over at a friend's place watching "Sex and the City" on TBS, and we both commented that we had seen this particular episode before. It was the one where Charlotte meets some celebrity actor at the gallery and becomes part of his entourage for the night.

My friend and I watched as Charlotte and the actor made out in a car. Later we watched as they hung out at a lounge with a crew of obnoxious people. A few moments into that, we watched as the actor blew marijuana smoke into Charlotte's mouth and tried to get her to join in. And then we watched as Charlotte said, "No, I don't think so," then got up and left. And then, to my astonishment, we watched the scene end.

If you are any kind of "Sex and the City" fan at all, then you know that in the original version of this episode, Charlotte actually leaves because the actor asks her to do something much more obscene — this is a family blog, so I'll just say that it involves her going to the bathroom, doing something with her hand, then letting him smell her finger. But in the syndicated version, they made it some sort of weird after-school special where Charlotte overcame peer pressure and found the courage to say no to drugs. Hilarious!

The funniest part of this all is that it turns out my friend had never seen the original episode, just this version on cable. It makes me realize that there's a whole generation of people out there who will watch syndicated "Sex and the City" and get a completely skewed perspective of the show. Kind of like people who watch "Love, Actually" on a plane, perhaps never realizing that an entire storyline involving movie body doubles has been edited out.

To me, this raises some interesting questions. Can someone say they've seen a TV show episode (or a movie) only if they've seen the original, unedited version? Do the differences actually matter? Oh, well. No time to dwell on these issues. "The Hills" just finished recording on my DVR, and I must go watch it now. Jason's back!

Not so sweet on "Sugar Rush"

2006-06-18T17:32:00.000-07:00

So, it's been over a month since my last post, which, I know, is bad for a blog. Even the summer TV season provides some new episodes amongst the re-runs. Luckily, I have a readership of zero, so no harm done.

Unfortunately, I don't have any kind of spectacular insights to offer in this first post back from oblivion. Instead, I just want to say this: I don't understand how Warren Brown has a show. He's the host of "Sugar Rush" on the Food Network, which has a wonderful concept: as the Web site describes it, the show "showcases the most sinful, the most artistic, and the most theatrical desserts on the planet." Now, I LOVE food — even more than I love TV, which is saying a lot — so of course I'm already a sucker for gustatory TV. But sweets being almost universally enjoyed, a show like "Sugar Rush" should be a shoo-in with everyone.

Why, then, did the Food Network make Warren Brown the host? Maybe he approached them with the concept — I don't care. They should have stolen the conceit and put someone else in charge or just waited until another chef pitched a similar show. Because Warren Brown is totally stilted and stiff in front of the camera. Since ostensibly he's passionate about the topic, he should be able to speak in an unaffected way; instead, he sounds like he's reciting a rehearsed speech, inserting a pause in between every clause as if he were standing behind a podium. I hate that in any form of public speaking, but it's even worse on a show like this. As they made perfectly clear on the competitive reality series "The Next Food Network Star," it's critical that the host come across as personable and natural. So why oh why don't they do something about Warren Brown?

And although, yes, I do tend to be incredibly critical, I don't know if the public would consider my standards in this department to be particularly high. While everyone was criticizing Al Gore of being too robotic during the 2000 presidential race, I found him to be perfectly warm and affable. So you can imagine that when I posit that Warren Brown is wooden, that's really saying something. Lest you think I'm exaggerating, just watch the show yourself.

It's a wonder I even had time to watch "Wonder Pets"!

2006-04-27T22:38:00.000-07:00

Wow, it's been a while since I've posted on this thing. I know that blogs are supposed to be updated regularly, but it's not my fault that I've been on hiatus: I had out-of-town visitors for about a week, so I was actually doing things in my free time other than watching TV and wasting time online. Imagine that!

However, my addition to TV being what it is, I could not abandon the tube altogether. I was actually able to introduce a couple of my visitors to the joy of "Wonder Pets"! And, of course, they loved it! Well, as least one of them did. But she loved it so much, she even made her boyfriend watch it when she got home. Think I'm making it up? Read her email below:

By the way, I watched Wonder Pets this morning. It was the one about the dinosuar. Too cute! I made Danny watch with me, and he agreed that it's a great show. Thanks for introducing me to it. I've had the songs stuck in my head all day.

Take that, o ye of little faith. Granted, this particular friend is studying early education, but I was also able to get the theme song stuck in the head of another friend who's in financial consulting. So there.

Animated historical fiction? Fellow dorks rejoice!

2006-04-16T10:56:00.000-07:00

If you love Joseph Ellis' Founding Brothers, then you'll love the cartoon show "Liberty's Kids." Well, I don't know if you'll love it since it's not the most innovative or well-written cartoon ever. But you'll definitely want to check it out because the conceit is fascinating.

The show is described on the web site as "an animated adventure television series for children ages 8-14, about three kids who, by working as reporters for Ben Franklin, bring to life the american revolution." For a fuller description of the show, you can visit the "About the Show" page of their web site.

And check out the cast list, which is awesome. Some highlights: Walter Cronkite as Ben Franklin, Billy Crystal as John Adams, and ... wait for it ... Sylvester Stallone as Paul Revere! You know, maybe I should take back what I said about the show not being that innovative. I mean, Rambo as revolutionary — that's pure genius!

Check out your local WB schedule for times. Looks like it's a regular Sunday morning thing on WB11 in New York. One can only hope that's true across the country.

It goes there — and so do your friends!

2006-04-15T01:11:00.000-07:00

I'm incredibly pleased that more and more of my friends are getting hooked on "Degrassi." Last Thursday, a friend who is trying to get caught up on old episodes invited me over to watch a marathon in preparation for the premiere. Although I'm sure she enjoys my company in general, I think at least part of her motivation was to get me there so that I could fill in holes in past plotlines. Unfortunately for both of us, I couldn't make it that night. (If you're a loyal reader of this blog — assuming I actually have readers, which is not a smart bet — then you may remember that I went to a play reading that night, but did enjoy some "Degrassi Minis" afterwards.) Anyway, I did go over to my friend's place the next night to watch the premiere with her and her boyfriend... who is also into the show! And the next day, I hung out with another friend who also watches "Degrassi" regularly with her boyfriend. I love that "Degrassi" can bring couples closer together.

Not to mention that it's an endless source of conversation. Tonight, another friend and I spent an entire half-hour subway ride discussing old storylines because she has only watched more recent episodes (one right after another, on YouTube). The people sitting next to us must have thought we were still in high school. But as I've said before, I make no apologies for my TV-watching habits. I had to get my friend ready for tonight's new episode, didn't I?

(Which was very enjoyable, btw. I love the Craig-Manny-Ellie thing. Not enough of the Ellie-Jimmy angle in tonight's episode, but I guess I can wait. Well, I mean, I don't really have any choice, do I? Oh, "Degrassi," how you tease.)

Seth & Summer: Falstaff to Ryan and Marissa's Hal? Discuss.

2006-04-13T22:50:00.000-07:00

Tonight's episode of "The OC" was extremely enjoyable. I feel like the series has been languishing a bit this season, but if last week's and this week's shows are any indication, then things are promising to pick up. Perhaps I'm just biased because I enjoy the Seth/Summer storylines more than all the ridiculous Ryan/Marissa drama, and now they're finally getting their due. For a while now, Seth and Summer have been nothing more than comic relief and it's good to see that their characters are getting a meaty plotline of their own. And it has the added benefit of actually being realistic. Imagine that!

And to top it all off, next week's episode looks like it's going to be awesome. When I saw Teresa and the baby, I was so moved that I couldn't help crying out, "Oh, yeah!" In my apartment. By myself. The power of good TV, eh?

Gonna take pollution down to zero!

2006-04-12T22:07:00.000-07:00

Everyone's favorite eco-hero is back! According to an industry newsletter, in celebration of Earth Day, Boomerang is going to show a marathon of 13 previously unseen"Captain Planet" episodes on April 22, 7:30-11:30 a.m. Awesome! I can't wait to see the Planeteers use their crazy rings to conjure Captain Planet so he can fight 13 new evil polluters.

Okay, truth be told, I'm probably not going to watch. Earth Day is a Saturday, and I have friends visiting from out of town. Yes, theoretically, I could record the marathon on my beloved DVR, but I don't have that kind of space! Still, I'm glad to hear this news; I used to love "Captain Planet," and I hope that a new generation of kids will discover the power behind Earth, Fire, Water, Wind, and Heart.

Although, while we're being honest, I didn't even know Boomerang existed. But I'm guessing that cartoon-loving kids probably do. It's a shame I didn't learn about this channel earlier, though, because in addition to "Captain Planet," they also show "The Snorks"!

Mrs. Kim Strikes Back!

2006-04-11T22:28:00.000-07:00

I'm glad to see that "Gilmore Girls" has hit its stride once again. Recently, I've been feeling like the storylines have been on the contrived side and the characters' actions haven't been ringing true. But in tonight's episode, I think the show got back to its roots: Everybody acted completely in character, there were lots of bizarrely hilarious and hilariously bizarre moments, and — most importantly — Mrs. Kim made funny faces! Welcome back, my Stars Hollow friends. I've missed you.

Wow

2006-04-10T01:25:00.000-07:00

The recent election-focused episodes of "West Wing" have been purely exhilarating. My friend and I have been watching together in spurts — saving up episodes so we can watch two at a time — and afterwards we always have to take a few moments to gather ourselves. It's like: Whoa, what just happened, roll over and have a cigarette.

Of course, tonight's episode was the ultimate emotional rollercoaster. I actually went to see a concert and didn't get home until after midnight. Normally, I would just hold off on watching because as much as I love "The West Wing," I also like getting a full night's sleep before starting the workweek. Tonight, however, I couldn't resist. I had asked my friend to text my cell during the concert and let me know whether the election was called in this episode. As soon as I got his text message, I knew I'd be up late. So here I am, completely exhausted — and totally cried out from those Leo scenes — and 100% satisfied.

I can't believe they're canceling this show.

My one true love: DVR

2006-04-09T01:50:00.000-07:00

As I think is patently obvious, I love watching TV. So I absolutely adore my DVR. For those not familiar with the term, that stands for Digital Video Recorder. It's like Tivo, but it's available through Time Warner Cable, so it's part of my cable box.

Earlier today I had some friends over, and of course we hunkered down in front of the tube. Now, I've had DVR for about a year now, so it's not exactly a novelty. But such is the irrepressible spirit of the DVR: I will never get over the joy of what it offers. So with my friends as a captive audience, I couldn't resist demonstrating the beauty of my DVR for the umpteenth time. As I did so, one of them said, "Wow, you must spend a lot of time planning your TV watching." If you're familiar with DVR, then you know that this comment totally misses the point. One of the major advantages of having DVR is that it greatly cuts down on effort while simultaneously increasing your TV watching returns.

I honestly don't know how I survived without DVR. Thank goodness those days are over. No more Sophie's choices between two simultaneous shows (for example, that one horrible season when "The West Wing" and "The OC" were on at the same time). No more video tape labels with scribbles and cross-outs that I can't understand even though I'm the one who wrote them. No more rushing through dinner prep to get the food ready in time for prime time. No more planning bathroom trips and assorted chores around commercials breaks. Those of you with DVR or Tivo — which I'm thinking is most of you in this day and age — know what I'm talking about.

In the days before I got DVR, someone was singing the praises of his, and he said something that I'll never forget: "You plan your schedule around TV shows? Don't worry, it's nothing to be ashamed of. I did it too. Then I got DVR."

Or as a friend artfully described it today as he watched me gleefully refer to my list of upcoming recordings, "It's like an infomercial: Set it and forget it."

You know it's almost Passover/Easter when "The Ten Commandments" is on!

2006-04-08T18:21:00.000-07:00

Although I am not a fan of epic films by any means, I really enjoy watching Cecil B. DeMille's classic "The Ten Commandments" every year on ABC. I just learned that this year, the network is doubling the dogma drama with a new "Ten Commandments" mini-series.

This evening I watched a portion of ABC's special on the making of the new mini-series, and I have to say that it does not pique my interest at all. Why not? Well, one actress described it as a "down and dirty" version of "The Ten Commandments." Some people might be interested in that, but I don't want any part of it. What makes the classic version so delightful is its stylized grandeur. Don't take that away from me!

Maybe I'm being too hard on the new mini-series. Maybe they can make a "down and dirty" version and still maintain the weighty pomp that I love. But I'm not optimistic. Dougray Scott, who plays Moses, calls him "a famous character." Doesn't bode well, does it?

Fighting Fowl from Aardman: What's not to love?

2006-04-07T10:37:00.000-07:00

Holy cow! Or if I'm going to refer to a barnyard animal, perhaps I should say, "Holy chicken!"

I just learned about a new TV show from Aardman Animations, the studio behind the consistently delightful duo of Wallace & Gromit. The show, entitled "Chop Socky Chooks," is described in one industry newsletter as "a 3D animated series targeted at K7-11 that follows a team of kung fu chickens working undercover in Wasabi World, a shopping mall run by their arch-enemy Dr. Wasabi."

Holy poultry, I'm looking forward to watching these adventures on Cartoon Network. Apparently, it's set to premiere sometime during the 2006-2007 broadcast season.

Whatever it takes... I'm gonna watch me some "Degrassi" tomorrow

2006-04-06T22:44:00.000-07:00

I went to a play reading after work today, leaving very little time for TV-watching. Thank goodness for "Degrassi Minis"! Normally I find them maddenly short, but tonight the truncated suckers were just perfect.

Not that I understood the latest episode at all. The teaser on the site says, "What if Paige and Liberty got all 'Vice Versa' on us?" Um, what the hell is that supposed to mean? Is there a purpose to this episode?

Even so, I loved it, just as I love everying "Degrassi." Can't wait for what I'm sure will be a "go-there-y" season premiere tomorrow!

Yes, I have a problem: I watch "One Tree Hill"

2006-04-05T22:12:00.000-07:00

I'm a little ashamed to admit that I watch "One Tree Hill" religiously. I'm not sure why, since usually I proudly espouse the virtues of shows that others deride (e.g. "Degrassi: The Next Generation," "What I Like About You"). Maybe it has something to do with how patently trashy and ridiculous all the adult storylines are (i.e. any plot involving Dan and/or Deb). Contrived intrigue involving teenage characters is one thing — kids are idiots, everyone knows that — but am I actually supposed to believe half the atrocities that Dan commits?

Luckily for me, there was very little adult drama in tonight's episode. However, that meant more screen time for Chad Michael Murray, which apparently is unfortunate for some viewers. It turns out that there's been some kind of backlash against CMM (as he's been dubbed) since his split with co-star Sophia Bush. I had read in Entertainment Weekly that she cited fraud in her petition for annulment, which definitely piqued my curiosity. Sadly, I haven't been able to find any details on CMM's fraudulent offense. But I did locate news about one of CMM's more recent tresspasses, reported with delightful antogonism on this blog. Now that's the kind of drama I like to see!

Gimme More "Gilmore"

2006-04-04T22:59:00.000-07:00

Thank goodness "Gilmore Girls" is back! The lack of new episodes these past few weeks has really left a hole in my heart. And not a negligible hole either — more of a Miss Patty-sized hole.

Unfortunately, I wasn't wowed by tonight's episode. The biggest disappointment was the tame interaction between Zach and Mrs. Kim. What happened to the combustion we witnessed back in Season 5 when Mrs. Kim discovered Zach and Lane's relationship and confronted Zach in the street? In case you missed that hilarious tirade, the transcript is below, care of TwizTV.com:

You! You dirty, filthy devil boy! You will pay for this. You will burn in hellfire for this! You will swim in the sludge with Satan's hell-dogs, and feed them your innards for eternity! ... She's an innocent girl. And you are a wild pig of filth! I know! I know all you do! You think you can hide from me? That you can carry on your dirty, filthy schemes without me finding out? ... I heard about it! Kyon told me. She told me about your hands on Lane. You put your hands on Lane! My Lane! And before God, I swear that you will be punished. Because that is what happens to all swine that walk up tall!

I know the above harangue doesn't have quite the same effect on the page as it did on the screen, but you'll just have to take my word for it: comic perfection.

Thanks, Palladinos, for bequeathing your genius on TV watchers everywhere. A grateful (subset of) the nation is extremely happy to have "fresh" episodes once again. Although the preview for next week's episode is not purely thrilling. I mean, seriously, how many times are you going to trot out Jess as a plot twist? Enough already!

How I Miss "Your Mother"

2006-04-03T23:26:00.000-07:00

Mondays are hard. The first Monday after spring Daylight Saving Time is especially difficult. To help me get through the day, I kept in mind that when I was done with work, I would be able to relax at home with a loved one. You may be able to relate. Of course, in your case, that loved one is probably a person. I, on the other hand, am referring to my DVR.

In particular, I spent my low moments today reminding myself that I had a new episode of "How I Met Your Mother" to look forward to tonight. But when I got home, what did I see? "The New Adventures of Old Christine" in the slot usually reserved for Ted, Marshall, Lily, Barney, and Robin! And though it was an extremely pleasant surprise to see Hamish Linklater (an old friend from the short-lived hospital drama "Gideon's Crossing"), even he could not help me overcome my disappointment.

"How I Met Your Mother" really is a near-perfect sitcom — at least for me. The ensemble cast interacts naturally, and the breezy dialogue is somehow both fresh and familiar. Of course, the scenarios are sometimes ridiculous, but the show manages to be funny without feeling over the top. And their use of musical punctuation has been impeccable so far. The sweet opening strains of Pavement's "Spit on a Stranger" when Ted sought out Victoria at her bakery: emotional jackpot.

The only thing about the show that I just can't fathom: How is it possible that the actress who plays Robin never felt the need to adopt a stage name? Her name is Cobie Smulders, for heaven's sake!

Wonderful Pets!

2006-04-02T00:34:00.000-08:00

I love "Wonder Pets"!

Have you seen this show? Probably not, as you are not in preschool and are also not me. It's a series of operettas about classroom pets who save animals in trouble through teamwork.

I actually saw a commercial for the show a little while back and I didn't quite understand what it was. All I knew was that I laughed out loud in joy at the absurdity of the clip that they showed. So fans of absurdist theater — especially absurdist musical theater — this is a show for you.

And before you start to scoff, check this out, from the NYTimes:

The "Wonder Pets" music does not feature the tinny, saccharine melodies that often infect children's television shows. Rather, each episode uses an original score recorded by a live orchestra overseen by Jeffrey Lesser, the Grammy-winning record producer who is the show's music supervisor and who has worked with Barbra Streisand, Sinead O'Connor and Lyle Lovett. Larry Hochman, a veteran composer who received Tony nominations for his orchestrations for "Spamalot" and the revival of "Fiddler on the Roof," serves as the lead composer, and a host of other theater and film composers and arrangers have worked on the show, including Jason Robert Brown, who won a Tony in 1999 for best original score for "Parade," and Robert Lopez, who shared a Tony for best score with Jeff Marx for "Avenue Q" in 2004.

That said, I haven't been super impressed with the score. But you can see that, as Ming-Ming the duckling (pictured above) would say, "This is serious!"

Now, unlike Lisa Loeb's "Number 1 Single," I'm not advocating this show for everyone. But if you are at all inclined, you should check it out. Especially if you've been smoking pot.

"Wonder Pets" shows on Nickelodeon, weekdays at 11:30 a.m.

You say... stay tuned for a rockin' show!

2006-04-02T00:10:00.000-08:00

As you might have gleaned by the fact that my #1 pastime is watching TV, I'm incredibly lazy. So instead of coming up with a thoughtful and witty maiden post, I'm actually going to kick things off by adapting something that I wrote a while back for a different purpose: a post extolling the awesomeness of "#1 Single" on E!

Unfortunately, it looks like the first season is already over, but luckily there are re-runs, thank goodness! (Btw, is it just me or did the show's narrative arc end really abruptly? Did they actually plan it that way? Or was the show perhaps unexpectedly cut short?)

Anyway, here's my take on "#1 Single," doctored slightly for this blog so that I don't seem completely behind-the-times:

Everybody should watch "#1 Single" on E!. They repeat it, like, a hundred times every week, so there's really no excuse. Unless you don't have cable. But if you don't have cable, then you don't deserve the enjoyment that comes with watching this wonderful show anyway.

It's a reality show about Lisa Loeb looking for love in New York, and in the first episode she goes on a blind date involving karaoke and the guy sings "Stay" to her — very, very badly. She also introduces the audience to AirTroductions, a site where you create a profile for yourself and put in your flight number, and then you get matched with someone on your flight and you have the date on the plane. That could be a whole reality show right there, I think. Especially for international flights: Can you imagine the hilarity that would ensue from observing people trapped in a bad date for 6-13 hours?

But anyway, back to the reality of this reality show: In the second episode, we observe Lisa's plane date (it goes well but ultimately has negative ramifications), and the series continues its fabulousness from there.

Just like any red-blooded working stiff, I really hate Sunday nights. But thanks to "#1 Single," at least I've had something consistently wonderful to mitigate that pre-workweek sense of dread. Goodness, I hope there's a season two.